i woke up

I went to the hospital today. I went in, had the same nurse from previous times give me my IV. She's quite good :). The nurses love me for some reason. I think it's because I'm really, really positive and I'm always smiling. Not sure though. Anyways, I got rolled in, flipped over onto the operating table, got my blood pressure thing wrapped around my arm, an oxygen clip on my finger, and put my head in a hole. 2 Minutes later I felt this sting in my arm it hurt so bad then I was out. A couple weeks ago I got the same anesthesia but they put this medicine in me to keep it from stinging. I think the nurse forgot to do it this time because I remember her saying 'oops'


Well, I woke up during this thing. I fucking woke up. I heard them talking, I don't remember what they were saying but I heard them and I remember my back hurting. I started moving my arms because I knew I was not supposed to be awake. I heard the nurse say, 'she's moving her arm' then I stopped. Then I moved my arm again because I was still awake and I COULD NOT TALK it was so fucking weird. I couldn't talk so I think I mumbled something then I was out.


When I woke up, correctly this time, from the hip down I was completely numb. I couldnt lift my legs and I couldn't feel my feet. I couldn't wiggle my toes either or feel the nurse touch them. I remember when I had surgery in 2004 my mom would keep touching my feet to make sure I had feeling in them. 30 minutes later I could walk but my legs were pretty heavy. My throat burned so fucking bad I kept asking for sprite and more sprite.



They took the IV out and I left. My father got me keva juice and 2 hours later my throat still burns and my back burns as well. So fucking bad. Oh well. It's just the skin I don't really feel a lot of internal back pain which is great :)



here's a picture:
(click it.)





the dots are where dr brauder went in and burned my nerves. the scars are old from 2004.


I had to be woken up when I had my spinal fusion surgery because I lost a lot of blood. Dr. Madigan had to wake me up to make sure I could move my legs because they thought I was paralyzed. I don't remember being woken up. I'm glad I don't remember.


I'm feeling kind of sick now I don't think I should have eaten anything.................


Today I think I'll lay in bed I wish I had a cable box in my room. I'm really fucking cold. I woke up really fucking cold. I have 2 comforters so I'm good.


I don't want to go to school tomorrow.

I won't get my car back for about another week. Damn. oh well.